This is easily one of the most succinct yet detailed explorations of something I've felt deep down somewhere but never been able to conceptualise fully until reading this piece. Banger after banger of a paragraph resonates with me I keep wanting to pull quotes from it. Thank you for writing this. It's utterly brilliant.
I don't think a writer could hear higher praise. Thank you Chelsea! So glad you were able to resonate 🙏🏻 Rooting for you in your journey of showing up!
This is so relatable. Lately, I’m been noticing that what makes us human, and different from animals and plants, is our self-consciousness. This leads us to self-criticism, fear of others, and a need for validation (a perverse, simultaneous attraction and repulsion). Then I remember that we are also nature, and come from the same roots. Just as moss or a twisted tree doesn’t feel self-conscious, we as humans can surrender our self-consciousness and just be - for me, this happens most when I am literally touching nature. Writing is an exercise in tapping into essence (my me-ness), revealing it, and that expression go, like a leaf falling. I do this to model it for my kids, since I agree that, as moms, our hiding or making ourselves small, rather than being free, doesn’t serve our children.
Love this comment, Sabrina. I'm realizing that too. In order to really immerse myself into the real world, it requires me to step outside of my head. And it's wild how hard that can be to do! It's so enrapturing, all these different forms of self-consciousness. Writing certainly uses some of that as fuel, but it's healthy sublimation. It is a form of communion with others, because we're sharing and giving, instead of just remaining in our heads. It's definitely been a practice for me to learn to just let myself be in the world without all the extra judgment from my head, or attempting to control the judgments from other heads. I see it like taking a cold shower-- making myself exist without thinking about it for a certain period of time. It's forced at first and feels weird, but I hope to get to a point one day where it's more natural, or at least to be living with my wild mind a little more peacefully, like a twisted tree in the breeze. Lol
Brilliant piece, so many things I needed to read. The thing that is driving my writing lately is this need to "purge" the sanitary version of myself to make way for the raw and more authentic. There's always a topic I won't touch, or something I'm evading, if I'm being truly honest with myself. But I'm hoping to exhaust the filter at some stage 😂 Also really resonated with hiding behind Motherhood, I had idyllic visions of bringing baby everywhere and 5 days out of 7 I'm hiding behind his "schedule".
Thank you Sarah! You're so right, there's always something like that for me too. I'm slowly but surely trying to bring more of the rawness of my self too. I do think the filtering can get exhausting, and especially as moms, we have so little energy to lose already!
Aw I hear you with the baby and scheduling. I used to be so concerned about schedules with my first, but then I had another one and I was forced to do things a bit more chaotically and then realized that everything is actually okay in the end. But it's okay you need go at your own pace, especially when it's your first 🙏🏻
thank you so much for writing this 🥹 i immediately sent it to my dear friend who’s a mom to the sweetest little girl. she’s just now getting back into writing & im like YEEEESSSSSS 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
This is easily one of the most succinct yet detailed explorations of something I've felt deep down somewhere but never been able to conceptualise fully until reading this piece. Banger after banger of a paragraph resonates with me I keep wanting to pull quotes from it. Thank you for writing this. It's utterly brilliant.
I don't think a writer could hear higher praise. Thank you Chelsea! So glad you were able to resonate 🙏🏻 Rooting for you in your journey of showing up!
This is so relatable. Lately, I’m been noticing that what makes us human, and different from animals and plants, is our self-consciousness. This leads us to self-criticism, fear of others, and a need for validation (a perverse, simultaneous attraction and repulsion). Then I remember that we are also nature, and come from the same roots. Just as moss or a twisted tree doesn’t feel self-conscious, we as humans can surrender our self-consciousness and just be - for me, this happens most when I am literally touching nature. Writing is an exercise in tapping into essence (my me-ness), revealing it, and that expression go, like a leaf falling. I do this to model it for my kids, since I agree that, as moms, our hiding or making ourselves small, rather than being free, doesn’t serve our children.
Love this comment, Sabrina. I'm realizing that too. In order to really immerse myself into the real world, it requires me to step outside of my head. And it's wild how hard that can be to do! It's so enrapturing, all these different forms of self-consciousness. Writing certainly uses some of that as fuel, but it's healthy sublimation. It is a form of communion with others, because we're sharing and giving, instead of just remaining in our heads. It's definitely been a practice for me to learn to just let myself be in the world without all the extra judgment from my head, or attempting to control the judgments from other heads. I see it like taking a cold shower-- making myself exist without thinking about it for a certain period of time. It's forced at first and feels weird, but I hope to get to a point one day where it's more natural, or at least to be living with my wild mind a little more peacefully, like a twisted tree in the breeze. Lol
Brilliant piece, so many things I needed to read. The thing that is driving my writing lately is this need to "purge" the sanitary version of myself to make way for the raw and more authentic. There's always a topic I won't touch, or something I'm evading, if I'm being truly honest with myself. But I'm hoping to exhaust the filter at some stage 😂 Also really resonated with hiding behind Motherhood, I had idyllic visions of bringing baby everywhere and 5 days out of 7 I'm hiding behind his "schedule".
Thank you Sarah! You're so right, there's always something like that for me too. I'm slowly but surely trying to bring more of the rawness of my self too. I do think the filtering can get exhausting, and especially as moms, we have so little energy to lose already!
Aw I hear you with the baby and scheduling. I used to be so concerned about schedules with my first, but then I had another one and I was forced to do things a bit more chaotically and then realized that everything is actually okay in the end. But it's okay you need go at your own pace, especially when it's your first 🙏🏻
thank you so much for writing this 🥹 i immediately sent it to my dear friend who’s a mom to the sweetest little girl. she’s just now getting back into writing & im like YEEEESSSSSS 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Aw I love that! Thanks for reading and sharing 😊🙏🏻